A marriage vow is saying, “I know that you’re trouble! Me too! So we won’t leave, no matter what happens.”
~ Jordan Peterson
“I grew, she grew, we have more growing to do together.”
A little bit of wisdom about love and marriage for valentine’s day.
He nailed me. I’d never grow without a marriage vow. Like we often do, I would end up taking the easy path, run away from the arduous, thus resulting in me rarely confronting where i need to grow.
Relationships extrude truth about ourselves. Truths such as, I need to grow, and grow up. Truths like, the depth of my character, or lack of, to control by emotions, behaviors, the choice to be kind, supportive or helpful even when when i don’t feel like it. My ability to love, when it’s not a fairytale romance.
I placed a portion of the text from the video below.
He is no “preacher”, but gave the best practical advice for a path to grow up, than any preacher I’ve ever heard.
The vow should mean a lot!
We can grow up, together. Thankful to my wife for keeping her vow for 30.5 years at this point. I grew, she grew, we grew up together literally being maried at nineteen.
We have more growing to do together. It’s been a together journey.
I will stay! Always! I love you. I mean in all the good staying ways.
Happy Valentines Day!
“A marriage vow is saying, “I know that you’re trouble! Me too! So we won’t leave, no matter what happens.”
Well that’s one hell of a vow. But that’s why it’s a vow. That’s why you take it in front of a bunch of people. That’s why it’s supposed to be a sacred act.
What’s the alternative? What’s the alternative?
Everything is mutable and changeable at any moment. Go ahead and live your life like that and see what you’re like when you are fifty. Jesus, it’s dismal. Two or three divorces. You’re family is fragmented. You’ve got no continuity of narrative. And it’s not good for the kids, not by any stretch of the imagination. It’s a form if voluntary slavery i suppose.
It’s also the equivalent to the adoption of a responsibility. And there is more to it than that. If you can’t (won’t) run away, you can solve your problems.
Because, it might be, I’m stuck with you, so how about we fix things. Because the alternative is that we are going to be in a boxing match for the next forty years. That’s your alternative.
So, and you think you’re going to fix your problems without something like that hanging over your head? There isn’t a chance! You’ll just avoid them. That is what people do. It’s really hard to solve problems, especially in a relationship.
…. do you think you will do that (sort it out) unless there is a good reason?
No! We better sort this out because we are going to be carrying it around for the next forty years. That, maybe, is enough motivation so that you actually try hard to solve a problem.
It’s a lot easier to say, ” Ha, we’re not going there.” But then, good, you’ll have it every day, every goddamn day for the rest of your life.”